Thursday, March 29, 2007


I've been tagged by Preheated! It's my first tag and I feel like a real Blogger (tm) now... And maybe like I should send candy, or at the very least, some unagi... ;-)

Without further ado, then, 5 facts about me you wouldn't have known by reading the blog:

1) I used to supplement my income by hustling pool.
Indeed, I found fairly early on that the "but I'm just a girl!" line worked wonders in appropriating easy marks with a willingness to wager.
That, and shots of liquor.
Given my general ability to out-drink most as an old pro (working as a bartender has more than a few perks), it was less like gambling and more like taking candy from a baby.

2) I once was the token non-lesbian among both cast and crew in a short film about a young woman's journey out of the closet.
I played the lead role. The wrap party was.... interesting. To say the least.

3) I hold a Master's degree in one of the social sciences.
I can't begin to tell you how helpful any degree in any social science is in terms of one's ability to maneuver through society and this life. I graduated at the top of my class. I also can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of "wow, I would never have expected that from you" when talking to a colleague about my personal life. Apparently, I come off looking pretty prissy on the job. (ha!)

4) I am a gourmet cook.
My specialties are East Indian and Mexican. I also love to eat; one only need say the words "there will be wine and cheese" to ensure my attendance at an event.

5) I am heavily tattooed.
Which makes #3 even funnier to me! All of my work (save one piece) has been done by a professional artist who also happens to do tattooing. It is all located in places where I can choose whether or not it shows. I love the pain of the process - it's a release for me.

Whew! That was less painful than I thought it might be.
I wonder if I could convince Lou and/or Peony to respond.... haven't heard from either in a while...

Sugasm #72

The best of this weeks blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #73? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form.

This Week’s Picks
Big-Titted Muses (
“In the span of fifteen seconds, these two lovers instantly own the room, the camera, the cock.”

Make it Happen (
“Dip two strawberries in the chocolate, eat one and feed me the other.”

Water, Water Everywhere… (
“He pauses there, feeling the weight in his hands, then soaps my breasts, rubbing the nipples between his fingers and thumb.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Nathalie Portman is Naked (

Editor’s Choice
Control (

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

NSFW Pics (& videos)
Bathtub #2 HNT (
Cockslut Column #8 (
Jamie Lynn Nude (
Nikki benz episode 6 (
Oh these college girls (
Pretty In Pink (

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Always a Junkie (
The Blind Leading the Deaf (
The Early Days of Porn (
Fears and Tears (
Female Genital Mutilation vs. Hoodectomy (
More Sex Sometimes Leads to More Sex (
Skin on Skin (

Sex Advice
Ask Evil Baby! (
Reader Says: Ack! Ex Wants To Be Friends! What Now? (

Sex Work
Sex Work and Society (
Smooth is good, Smoother is better (

BDSM & Fetish
Amber (Part Six) April Fool’s (
Big O’s (
Do as you please with me Sir, i am yours (
Exposed (
Happy HNT - Hearts and fetish (
Just Rope (
Meeboguest G confesses: “I suck his cock” (
Whispers (

Sex Reviews
A Few of My Favorite Naughty Things Part II (
Love Honey Toys Review (
Vibrating Feeldoe Review (
Web Cam Girls for Live Chat (

Erotic Writing and Experiences
After his date. (
Another moment of promise. (
Ball Games (
Catch Me Off Guard (
Country Bar Bull Pickup (
First Time pt. 4 (
Fuckmaker’s Paradise (
A Love Triangle (
The Soap Job (
Three Way (
A Tiny Bed (
Until It Was Time For More (

Sex & Politics
Living in Sin (
Real Amateur College Porn (But Not How You Think) (

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Paging Dr. Bob

I'm out of control.
I've been out every night since last Monday.
So much for slowing my roll.

Tuesday I went to one of my favorite restaurants to make myself eat something. I try not to go in there too often, because the owner is jovial and perverted, which means that he gets me fucked up on tequila pretty much every time I visit, and then tries to fondle me or be otherwise inappropriate. It has turned out very badly more than once. God help me, I just adore that dirty old man anyway. It's hard to explain.

I went though because I needed to eat something, I haven't been doing much of that lately, and also because I was on the lookout for Dr. Bob, a surgeon I met in there the last time I got all fucked up on tequila.

Dr. Bob is an older (mid-50s), reasonably attractive (but much less so than Massimo) guy who seemed to fancy me when I met him. Actually, he told the owner that he was interviewing me. Seems Dr. Bob is looking for the 4th next-ex-missus Dr. Bob. His apparent confidence made him sexier, an aspect further increased by his surgeon salary. Those sorts of things make it easier to overlook the wrinkly skin and liver spots. And the mothball smell, but just barely.

I made myself all easily-spottable at the end of the bar, and sure enough, the good doctor happened by directly. The double-take and skid back to where I was made me giggle on the inside.

It seems that Dr. Bob had been back every day since we met, hoping I'd come in so he could finish his extensive vetting process. He had actually called everyone with my last name in the phone book trying to find me. Luckily for him, that is a short list. He doesn't know this, but he did call my sister; she told me I had had an anonymous caller there not too long ago. This was reiterated by the owner, who asked if my ears had been burning. Apparently the effort to locate my telephone number had been a team effort.

Dr. Bob and I became a bit more acquainted over dinner. I gave him my unlisted phone number, which he apparently shared with the owner, because both of them called me the next day.

It was still pretty early when I left, so I got to go hang out with my friends Dan and Jimmy at another bar, and watched Jimmy sing karaoke.

This is a side benefit of going out with someone who thinks 10pm is late:
One night, two chances for a date! No waiting!

Dr. Bob took me out to dinner on Wednesday, after we met at the bar of my friend's restaurant. I had the best tacos I've had this side of the border, which made me happy, and more amenable to Dr. Bob's relentless questioning about me, my values, and my beliefs.

I guess when you are Dr. Bob's age and on a mission, you really want to dispense with the formalities of the getting-to-know-you stage of a relationship and go fast-track. Time's a-wastin.

I let Dr. Bob kiss me goodnight. He wasn't bad, just out of practice, I think. He told me that it "has been years since [he'd] been with a woman."

I shook my head and tried to look appropriately appalled at his long drought.
"Poor bastard," I thought, "Years it's been, and along I come, working it like this year's Ferrari and your last ride was an '87 Datsun. In '87."

I threw the whammy down on Dr. Bob like the ruthless tramp I occasionally aspire to be.

And Dr. Bob was as good as fucked right there. He had that glaaaaaaazed look in his eyes after that first kiss. You know, the one zombies have when they're trying to eat your brains.

Poor Dr. Bob.
He never knew what hit him.

With a flick of my tongue, he was done.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Sugasm #70

The best of this weeks blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #71? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form.

This Week’s Picks
You’re So Dirty When You’re Clean. (
“The side of your hand slipping along her pussy lips. Her laugh, a mix of I-knew-it and do-that-more.”

Before (
“Condoms and lube go into the bedside drawer next to the Bible. Purse into the drawer with clothes, whore-bag into the closet with my street shoes.”

Rude Bits: Tracy Quan on the Raunch Debate (

“If someone is making money off your body, you should too.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Sex Mad(ness) (

Editor’s Choice
The art of pegs (some artistic CBT) (

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

NSFW Pics (& videos)
Heart Panties HNT (
Hillary scott episode 4 (
Just Teen Site’s Latest Nude Photo and Video ( )
Light’s Out! (
Veronika Zemanova Nude (

Sexual Poetry
Free verse smut (
Keys (
Poem: “International Women’s Day” (

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Confessors and Confessions (
Fuck Me, Daddy and Other Lessons (Part Two) (
A Fuck Superlative: Coming Together (
Hello, it’s Me, Again! (
Once a Junkie… (
Release (
Well, at least I have some good sexy thoughts anyways… ( )
Why I don’t do Myspace ( )

Sex and Politics
GOPorn: Smut and the American Conservative (
The Plot Thickens (
Teacher Fired over Porn Pop Ups (

BDSM & Fetish
A Confession (
Fake Spanking Filmmakers (
Fetish (
Happy HNT - Nipple clamp torture (
The Ideal Fantasy School (
Instant Replay (
Isabella’s Eyes - Part XV (
Sharing (
Y is for yes please (

Erotic Writing and Experiences
5 Questions - A house in the country - Part One ( )
Afternoon Delight (part 2) (
A Fish Story (
Just one hour to fuck (
A Little Anal (
The long tease (
Love Runs Hot (
Message Received (
My girlfriend the stripper, part 6 (
Snowbound (
A Soft Romance (
Vanilla spicy (

Monday, March 12, 2007

... Always a Junkie

I have the shakes.
And uneven breathing.

I feel hot.

I have tunnel vision and that addict's staggery walk.
I'm twitchy.

I can feel my every nerve ending.
My veins are throbbing and my spidey sense is tingling.

I can hear everything.
(If I didn't have this cold, I would probably smell everything too.)

I shirk personal responsibilities.
I hide in my house, blinds shut.

I don't answer the phone, but I want it to ring.
I let him leave a voice mail.
I make myself wait to check it.
I check the e-mail to see if he's in there.
I have no control.

The big junkie trap is thinking I can outwit the addiction.
It never works.

I don't want to talk to the soldier - the idea of him makes my gut roil with revulsion. I can't even think his name.
I did my duty; I fucked him three times and should have won an Oscar for my portrayal of the satisfied lover.
I just wanted to fuck his brains out, which I did, but I still have mine because he was a terrible lay, not at all skillful.
And to add insult to injury, quite small.

It was like that line in "O Brother, Where Art Thou": It aroused my appetite, but abated it none.

Now he wants to be my slave. And he wants to connect and bond.
This after I sent him home a day early, unceremoniously.
I want to not remember his name.
He calls and texts me incessantly. It's like an unseen barking dog I can't make stop.

I feel like a vampire - the lust for sex has replaced my soul.
When I look in the mirror, there is not even a mirage anymore. There is no reflection.

I'm angry with myself, and I want to run.
Or hide in the things that have served such a purpose in the past.

I'm thirsty.
I'm dying for a cigarette.
I'd love a line from here to the Yukon.
A spike in the vein.
Deep sleep.

The vibrator is my methadone right now.
It takes longer and isn't as effective as the real deal, but it does the trick eventually.
Afterwards, I'm just left with my shakes and the cold sweat and the tousled bedding.

I put a sheet over the mirror, and turn out the lights.
I'm just going to have to sweat it out.

I can sweat it out.

Friday, March 09, 2007


You remember that scene in Dances with Wolves, where the hygienically-challenged carriage guy with the unnatural predilection for pickled eggs was talking about a skeleton encountered on the prairie?
"Some back home is thinking, 'why don't he write?'"

I get that with this blog sometimes, and the perpetually-empty inbox. "Why don't s/he write?!" I wail (quietly, and to myself).
Well, I got an inkling of an idea as to why this might be this evening, whilst morosely poking around my own site, vigorously _not_ getting laid or doing other fun and blog-worthy stuff....
The option to contact me by e-mail was nowhere to be found, which, I think, explains a lot.
I'm such a tool sometimes, seriously.

Anyway, that's all fixed now, but if you're too lazy to go look at my profile (heehee!), you can e-mail me at: miamahana at hushmail dot com.

I'd love to get your feedback, comments, and suggestions about me, my freakshow of a life, and of course, the blog.
Something you want to hear more about? Less about? Let me know.
Love me? Hate me? It's all good. Let me know.
Because I don't know what I don't know until someone lets me know I don't know it.


Slow That Roll

Well, dammit.
I had my weekend all planned out, and it did not include this vicious cold that has beaten me by TKO.

I felt it coming the other day, and tried to avoid it by popping Airborne like it was candy, and drinking lots of water and tea, and trying to rest (efforts that were thwarted by job-related hijinks), but no.
Phlegm is here, and it's trying to get the "stay 3 nights, get the 4th free!" deal.

And like that, my well-thought out and super-efficient plans for this weekend are pfft.

To wit: Jose should have been here now, and we would have been out at dinner, or I would have been humming the Battle Hymn of the Republic while he raised his pole and plunged it into my valley, or whatever else it is crazy folk do before hitting the town.

I had prepared for this visit with some help from Junior, who was kind enough to rearrange a couple of my rooms for me. Obviously, he was not fully aware of the motivation behind my haste to get this job done.

This is awful, I know.

If it makes you feel any better about it, I did ensure that he was able to make an informed choice before he made his decision to move my shit. I reminded him that I was "no contact" because it's _that_ time of the month, y'know, and also I felt a cold coming on, and I was on call at work. I advised him of all of these things, and repeated the question: "all that and you _still_ want to move my bedroom?"
And he stated that he did; he had offered to help, and said that he had plans this weekened and wouldn't be able to do it then, so... yes.
I thought to myself that it all sounded suspiciously boyfriend-like, but let him do it anyway.

I'm little, and my furniture is big. Who am I to pass up on offers of "free" labor?
(I put "free" in quotes, because all that effort on his part did result in my feeling compelled to perform some sort of sex act in gratitude, so I sucked that cock like it was my last meal, and let him fuck my face until he came all over it, so I guess that's something, eh?)
Anyway, I love the new arrangement, and it will be much more comfy and happy for me and Jose or Junior or whoever else happens to be spending the night now that the Animal Planet that lives here can be locked out of the new bedroom. Yay!

Well. That was certainly a bit of a digression.

To wit: Because Jose is not here now, he will have to come tomorrow instead, which means that I will not be able to go back to the hot-shit club I met him outside of last week like I had planned to with my friend. And now I run the heightened risk that we will run into Junior or Evan while out on the town, which could be disastrous.
I'm going to have to take him out because I barely know him, and it would be creepy to just keep him locked up in my house and just fuck him the whole time. After all, that's what Junior is for! (oh, good grief) Besides, I believe you should get out and see a place if you've never been there before, and this is his first time to my fair city. And he did ask to be shown around. Hm. I guess it's a good thing I'm getting some rest today.

To wit: Had I not had all these well-laid plans ready for execution, I am also missing the last minute spontaneous invite to Las Vegas for the weekend by an old friend whom I love too much to just fuck. Which sucks, because Vegas with the right people is a blast, and this guy is the right people.


So, I'm taking the illness as a non-negotiable message from the bod to slow my roll. I've spent the day in and out of bed, on and off of the couch, in and out of the sun (at least there is no effort in working on my tan). Evan brought me food, Jose offered to come take care of me, and my ma has called several times to check on me. I feel well cared for. I'm pissed that I haven't been able to go to the gym, but I've lost a few pounds already just because I'm not doing much in the way of eating, just pushing liquids. I haven't heard from Junior, which annoys me, then I get more annoyed with myself that I feel that annoyance toward him. *sigh* It's like his relational schizophrenia is contagious.

Ah well, here we are, then.
Whether this be a true opportunity for restoration, or merely the calm before the next storm, I intend to enjoy it as much as I am able.

Thank god for vibrators.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

A Good Day

I finally started my period. I don't remember the last time I was so happy to bleed. No gonna-be-a-momma-drama. What a relief.
I sensed an odd vibe off of Junior when I told him how lucky I felt, and how lucky he should feel too. He has a serious resistance to using protection. I'm generally not a fan of them either, but I admit their usefulness and necessity. I also admit some stupid choices in that area which led to the aforementioned stress and anxiety about the arrival of my crimson tide. He seemed more subdued when I told him. I wonder if he isn't, on some level, hoping to make someone a momma. It's a sure way to lifelong attachment and I get the sense that attachment is more important to him than he lets on.
Well. That's not good. And it's not going to be me. I don't care how much I love to ride a dick bareback. Who doesn't?! But, it's not worth the trauma of constant concern.

Over the weekend, I met a tall hot soldier. Tall is important. FrankenMan is tall. Because you have to be at least six feet to ride this ride (although I did meet a short-but-hot Cuban/Jamaican the other night I imagine might meet other equally-important requirements).
I will, for the moment, reserve judgment and not pass on Jose because he is from Texas (central Texas, even. Yikes!). Because do you have any idea how rare a tall hot Latino is?!
Oh, yeah, so the good news is that I have arranged for this fine young serviceman to come visit me this weekend whereupon I intend to attend to my civic duties, having contributed little in that area for quite some time.
I may not believe in this war, but I certainly believe in the men and women bound to fight in it. I can't do much to show my support, but at least I can contribute to some serious R&R (at least one of the "R"s anyway) for one good soldier. Or delinquency and debauchery. You choose.
At any rate, it's been a good long time since I had a member of this particular branch of the armed forces, and being reasonably close to the water these days, it seems like the right thing to do.

And finally....
Things had gotten weird there with Junior over the last week or so. I had made the mistake of advising him that I like my relationships good and defined, and that his choices were as follows: temporary ongoing sex partner or guy I attempt to date.
Apparently the pressure of being put on the spot with this choice was too much for him to bear, because he kept stalling me out, despite my argument that this is not requiring of a lengthy conversation, Act of God, or letter to a congressperson. Just a descriptional term.

Well, perhaps you can see the source of the difficulty here?
I finally got it.

He is 22.
And he has issues.

So, the moral of the story is: 22 is no time for such existential questioning.

I finally remembered who I was dealing with here (Hot date = Jack in the Box, remember?) and sent an e-mail (several days after one that pretty much said straight out that I was not interested in further engagement with him to which he replied something to the effect of, "what do you mean by that?") that said something like, "look. I was perfectly happy just fucking you because you're tall, hot, pleasantly-shaped, and not actively psychotic. I don't want a serious or committed relationship. If you can deal with this, feel free to call me."
Of course, I used all the right words and appropriate manipulative terms that I estimated would keep me from looking like an old lady desperate for his cock whilst simultaneously stroking his ego, 'cause he likes that.

I received an e-mail within the hour, and two calls later that evening.
And like that, I was able to restore my perfectly amenable casual fucking relationship with this hot little oddity. This is good, because I really do enjoy fucking and getting fucked by Junior.

I am a lucky girl right now. Yes, I am. And quite proud of myself for having managed to line up a steady supply of cock for at least three months without the worries associated with emotional engagement.

Now all I have to do is wait out the period...

Monday, March 05, 2007


I admit it.

I saw your pasty and wide pale face, your plastic put-on grin that inadequately covered the leer lurking beneath it, your off-the-rack suit you then had tailored to fit you better, your pudgy fingers sporting only your class ring, and your girth that I'm sure has spread substantially since your glory days in school team sports.

I observed that look of entitlement in your squinty becircled eyes, and the near-appearance of fangs and drool as you stalked me in a public forum.

Duly noted are your limp handshake that you allowed to linger for a second too long, and your lame attempts at engaging me in conversations whilst simultaneously dropping names that may mean something to some, but hold no sway over me.

I admit it.

All that and my conclusive thought (after the shock at your blatant salaciousness in a completely inappropriate venue for that sort of thing) was:

All right. I'll fuck you.
I'll fuck you until you can't see or breathe or think straight and take your shit too.

Sunday, March 04, 2007


For the Love of Cake and Cock (sounds like a girl after my own heart!) - Randy chick spouts off on two of my favorite topics...
And Sugasm - a weekly smorgasbord of sex photos, essays, and other writings. Good times!

Also, thanks to Kim for the mention on her site at, which was a new site to me!

Sugasm #68

The best of this weeks blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #69? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form.

This Week's Picks
First Client (
“He buries his nose in my pussy, licks me while I suck him, rubs his mouth up and down me.”

His Point of View (
“Once he shut the door — urgently, impatiently, with a deft kick of his heel and a satisfying thud as the lock caught, all vestiges of decorum disappeared.”

Why is My Sex Ed Class so Sticky? (
“This game was played for NINE years, and it’s only this year that parents are writing the school board?”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Thumbnail Gallery Problems (

Editor's Choice
More on submissives with lists (

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Great Moments in Sex Education (
Half-Nekkid Nightie (
Hot Studs Have Feelings Too. (
I Am Greatful! (
If I Die… (
Let Me Out of Here! (
Pull my hair (
The thing about size…. (

NSFW Pics (& videos)
“26 Reasons for The Birth of This Blog” (
Belated VDay Gift from Tila Tequila (
Crystal Klein nude photos (
Happy HNT - Masturbation erotica (
I wish it was summer (
Jamaica in the Kitchen (

Sex Work
Session To Do List (

Sex News, Reviews and Interviews
Baby Bug Vibrator Review (
It keeps going and going and…dying (
Kiri or Jules? (
Taco Tuesday: Toy Review 3 “Adonis” (

Sex and Politics
Anti-Anti Pornography, Part V: How Hypocrite Can You Get? (

BDSM & Fetish
Atlanta Flight (
Contrast revisited (
Dirty laundry (
From memory (
Knowing looks (
Meeboguest G confesses: “I’ve been watching my wife get fucked” (
Quest for fire… (
What to do in a tight situation (

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Belated NYE Party @ T’s part 2 (
Do you want to share a cab (
Giving and Receiving (
Grinding it (
Indulging in a Virtual Tryst Part VII (
Lips…. (
My girlfriend the stripper, part 5 (
My idea of a love letter to SMW (
Swingers Night!! (